Wednesday, August 31, 2005

MULLER FOR PRESIDENT! Who?

A 22 year old from Luxombourg has made history. Unless you are in his home country I doubt it will be billed that way, however. Should it be? Maybe not, but the fact is this kid played well. The focus seems to be on how crappy Roddick played. Granted it was not his best showing, but let's give is opponent a little credit. Muller hit twice as many winners and Roddick only made 15 unforced errors. As any tennis player or sports enthusiast knows, there is more to the story than just stats. In the defense of the Roddick Sucked band wagon; the 15 unforced errors were in three sets not 4 or 5. And, if he is not making great shots it is leaving the other guy open to step up and hit winners regardless if it is recorded an unforced error. I understand all of this and reiterate the point that Roddick did not have his best match.

The point I am making is that this guy Muller stepped up, pulled his nuts out, and beat the crap out of Roddick. The pressure this kid surrmounted to get through three sets worth of not soiling himself against a top five player deserves mention. We're not talking three easy sets either. Three tie breakers with Roddick in the US open: now that takes guts to survive. Muller had that. On the other side of this he will be so high on the win that he'll get trounced in the next match or so. Of course the other possibility is an ere of confidence that will earn him respect and not the "fluke" who beat a champion.

So what of this champion? He has millions of women around the world ready to fall at his feet, tons of cash flowing in from endorsements, and let's not forget potentially several more years of living this lifestyle. So he had a bad day at the office, I'm still not going to feel sorry for him.

MULLER FOR PRESIDENT! Who?

A 22 year old from Luxombourg has made history. Unless you are in his home country I doubt it will be billed that way, however. Should it be? Maybe not, but the fact is this kid played well. The focus seems to be on how crappy Roddick played. Granted it was not his best showing, but let's give is opponent a little credit. Muller hit twice as many winners and Roddick only made 15 unforced errors. As any tennis player or sports enthusiast knows, there is more to the story than just stats. In the defense of the Roddick Sucked band wagon; the 15 unforced errors were in three sets not 4 or 5. And, if he is not making great shots it is leaving the other guy open to step up and hit winners regardless if it is recorded an unforced error. I understand all of this and reiterate the point that Roddick did not have his best match.

The point I am making is that this guy Muller stepped up, pulled his nuts out, and beat the crap out of Roddick. The pressure this kid surrmounted to get through three sets worth of not soiling himself against a top five player deserves mention. We're not talking three easy sets either. Three tie breakers with Roddick in the US open: now that takes guts to survive. Muller had that. On the other side of this he will be so high on the win that he'll get trounced in the next match or so. Of course the other possibility is an ere of confidence that will earn him respect and not the "fluke" who beat a champion.

So what of this champion? He has millions of women around the world ready to fall at his feet, tons of cash flowing in from endorsements, and let's not forget potentially several more years of living this lifestyle. So he had a bad day at the office, I'm still not going to feel sorry for him.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Looters on TV and Jim Cantore

Having watched Hurricane Katrina unfold on Sunday and Monday on TV we decided to check out the aftermath today. The destruction is unbelievable in New Orleans and in Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama.

Unfortunately, the sun is out and the looters are as well down there. Looters were taking anything they could get their hands on even though they most likely had no where to put any of it.

There was footage taped in a Wal-Mart down there in what I believe was New Orleans and the looters didn't even care. I'm not saying that I would do any looting, but I do know that if I was doing any looting I would wrap it up just about the same time that CNN showed up. I can honestly say that I wouldn't be stupid enough to be walking around only to look up and find a camera 3 feet from my face.

Those are some shameless idiots down there that are walking around on camera with hundreds of dollars of clothes in their arms or pushing shopping carts full of merchandise.

I do love to see me some Jim Cantore down there on the Weather Channel though. He makes things fun because he's not down there to report about the storm. He's there to survive it. Wherever the most danger is going to be, he's out in waste-deep water hoping that he doesn't catch a stop sign with his head.

Jim doesn't even look like a weather man. He strikes me as a guy that blew his knee out in the last football game of his senior season and it turned out that he only needed 2 more credit hours for a bachelors in meteorology.

He was talking to a colleague down there who was reporting from the storm and I kept expecting him to look at her and say, "You know, back in '93, I could throw a football a quarter mile."

If there was a gunfight in the middle of a thunder storm, Jim Cantore would be there with bells and body armor on.

Gov. Ernie Fletcher, just another politician.

What the heck is going on here in the great state of Kentucky? I thought the new Fletcher administration was going to clean up the democrats’ mess and run a nice tight ship. Well apparently it was all political speak, you know, promises that are never intended to be kept. Fletcher seems like a pure bred tool, especially after he pardoned people who weren’t even indicted with anything. I think he just knew it was coming and he would head them off at the pass.

Apparently Fletcher’s henchmen have been booting democrats out of government jobs and stocking them with friends or at least people of the same political party. I would have to believe that this sort of thing goes on everywhere, but wouldn’t you know that ol’ Ernie “clean up Kentucky government” Fletcher would get busted. Just to show he never forgets a friend even if it could make him look like a bigger moron than he does now, he pardons the wrongdoers before they are charged with anything. I give him credit there, any self respecting politician would have disavowed any knowledge of what these people did and claimed to have never known them. Although, like a good politician, Fletcher did plead ignorance by claiming he never knowingly broke any laws. That is a good politician’s excuse. I wish I could use that excuse, “I’m sorry officer; I didn’t know there was a law against killing someone. I gotta plead ignorance on this one.”

Fletcher was called before a grand jury today. He didn’t pardon himself, just the others who were charged with being idiots. Wait a minute; I never knew a governor could pardon themselves. I guess that means Fletcher could murder someone and pardon himself and go about his business, but I digress. Fletcher was in the room with the grand jury for roughly 3 minutes. I can only surmise that he was called up, sworn in, asked a question, and then he pleaded the fifth. When your governor has to plead the fifth in any court proceeding, you know you screwed up in electing him to office.

I don’t claim to be a great political writer, nor do I claim to know all the ins and outs of this situation. One thing I do know is that it doesn’t matter if you are a democrat or a republican, you lie when trying to win an election and you lie when you get in office. I may take a little more delight in the fall of a republican, but that is because they are the ones who seem to be holier than thou. Republicans never mess up, they are never wrong. Democrats remind me of Day-Day in Friday After Next when he claims, “Man, I screw up all the time.” Democrats screw up and we expect that.

Since I have been keeping up with politics, at least a little more than when I was a teenager, I have noticed a few things. No matter your party, both get busted about the same amount of times, the offenses are what separate democrats from republicans. When democrats are involved in a scandal, you can bet you bottom dollar that it is a sexual scandal. When republicans are involved in a scandal it seems to be over money or power. Republicans don’t have sex, unless it is with money or in oil. This is my little political piece for the year perhaps. I hope you enjoy it and I hope you enjoy watching all your elected officials lie to you. They all do it. In reality they are both part of the same party, the human party.

Prison Break on Fox, can it work?

Can this show really work? Have I been tricked into watching a show that will just be canceled in a few weeks? The show is Prison Break on Fox. It premiered on Monday night at 7 central and was a 2 hour premiere. The premise is a man is sent to prison for a murder he didn’t commit, at least that is what he is saying. He was accused of killing the Vice President’s brother. The evidence was overwhelming and there was even some video proof, but he still claims his innocence. No one believes him, except his loyal brother.

Did I mention that the Secret Service is involved in some kind of cover-up? Did I mention that the brother of the convicted killer convinced a lawyer friend to uncover the cover-up? Did I mention that the man in prison is sentenced to die in one month’s time? Well, he is. So what does the loving brother do to save his brother’s life? He plans and researches and then he robs a bank only to get caught. He pleads no contest to the charges and then is incarcerated in the same prison that his brother is in. The reason he does this? He is going to break out of prison with his brother, and apparently some other “helpers.”

I have to admit, when I first heard about this show, I thought, “this will never work.” They can’t have more than one season of this show because when they break out it’s over. I read an article with someone close to the show and he said they have enough right now for a second season. They claimed that the story will not end when someone breaks out, it is only beginning. They plan to follow the stories of all of those who break out of the prison and they have already introduced some pretty interesting characters.

So what did I think about Prison Break? I thought it was a very interesting show. There is nothing like it on TV right now and I hope that it stays this interesting. After the end of it I was already anticipating next week’s show. I have to admit I am a sucker for prison movies or shows like Oz, mainly because they are a good deterrent. If you watch a good prison movie, you won’t even drive over the speed limit for fear of going to prison.

So far this show has it all when it comes to prison life, not that I know what prison life is like except from TV. It has the man to see when you need some pharmaceuticals. It has had a race war with shankings and shivings. It has had the hinting of man love. Everything a good prison show needs. If all of this appeals to you, you are in luck. Fox is rerunning the premiere on Thursday at 7 PM central time. I think it will be a show to keep your eye on, I just hope that Fox doesn’t yank it out from under those of us who get sucked in.

Monday, August 29, 2005

Burger King and Slipknot locked in a death match.

As I have sat in my home and watched hours and hours of TV over the years, I noticed how the commercials that were shown were, in a word, lame. The ad wizards always seemed to jump on a trend about 6 months too late. Two years after hair metal was killed by Seattle grunge, commercials were still riding the hair metal bandwagon as long as it could. Unless it was a Sportscenter commercial, I tend to not watch them. Now, I DVR everything and skip all commercials.

I have, however, noticed a certain set of commercials lately. They are Burger King commercials. This time the product is lame while the commercials are hilarious. Burger King has hit on a trend that is still going on. The trend is that metal, especially 80’s metal, is becoming somewhat popular again. Burger King has invented a band named Coq Roq. They have a website at coqroq.com.

The big question I have is how BK got the FCC to let them use the name Coq Roq. I know it isn’t spelled the same and it is a “band of chickens,” but come on. Coq Roq? If you haven’t seen the spots, the band is performing a concert hyping the new BK chicken fries. The band is dressed, or disguised, in chicken masks. The first time I saw this, I thought that looks like a Slipknot gag.

For those who do not know of the metal band Slipknot, they are a pure heavy, speed metal band that may or may not worship satan. That is to be debated. Many bands put out satanic like music to get publicity and attention. The whole “there is no such thing as bad publicity” thing. Whether Slipknot is or is not satanic, they kinda give off that impression. That is why I was so surprised to find that BK had actually approached Slipknot to appear in a BK ad campaign to “motivate young people to vote.” I thought Slipknot wanted to motivate young people to riot, but that’s just me.

Apparently Slipknot thought this over and finally decided they did not want to be associated with hamburgers. BK decided that wasn’t good enough and they invented there own chicken Slipknot. At least that is how the real band looks at it. Slipknot sent a cease and desist letter to BK and then BK filed for a federal action that lets them keep on keepin’ on.

I really have to wonder what the head guys at BK are smokin’. Of all the bands in the world, why would you want Slipknot to be associated with you? I don’t know if BK realizes how lucky they are that Slipknot turned them down. I can’t imagine the protests and boycotts that would have been called out. I am also surprised that big, bad Slipknot is even acknowledging the fake chicken band. I would think they wouldn’t even pay attention to something this stupid, but everybody’s got lawyers, I guess. I guess we will have to wait and see if Slipknot can cut the head off of BK’s Coq.

Suge Knight shot at Kanye West's party. I would rather take my chances with Hurrican Katrina.

What do you do if you wanted to die, but couldn’t bring yourself to commit suicide? Well, shooting Suge Knight in the leg at a party is a good start. Mr. Knight was at a party hosted by everyone’s new favorite rapper, Kanye West. The reason I believe that this is a man who just wants to die but can’t commit suicide is because the assailant fired six shots and hit Mr. Knight in the leg. I would have to believe that if I wanted to kill someone, and that someone was as big as a house, I think with six shots, I could hit more than his leg.

Don’t know who Suge Knight is? Check the article on the shooting I have linked to my piece. Here are some highlights. He ran a record company name Death Row. He has been in and out of prison like 100 times in the last 10 years. He has been known to associate with the Bloods. Don’t know them? You must not be a gangsta rap fan. He allegedly held Vanilla Ice by his feet over the ledge of a balcony high above a city street to get the publishing rights to his music. He is alleged to have been behind the murder of the Notorious B.I.G. Now all of this is alleged and I am only reporting this, not accusing anyone. I don’t want the wrong people to take this the wrong way. I want to live!!! Now back to the article.

The police are baffled that no one seems to have seen or heard anything. I would have thought that everyone at a party thrown by a rapper that was attended by many other rappers would be more than ready and willing to help law enforcement officials find this man. I am also sure that most at the party realize that if this isn’t taken care of the RIGHT way, meaning not the police, court, and prison route, then they too may end up like this hopelessly hapless shooter is sure to end. I am sure Mr. Knight has never seen the shooter before and wouldn’t know any reason why someone would do this to him.

Police say that the shooter’s identifying characteristics were that he was a black man in a pink shirt. Heck, that sounds like Kanye West to me, but he seems like a smart guy. Perhaps it was a Kanye imposter. Maybe the shooter thought that because he was wearing a pink shirt, that the rest of the guests at the party would be so appalled at his fashion sense they wouldn’t even bother to look at his face. But, if this is a man on a suicide mission as I believe, then he was banking on the party guests seeing his shirt and then looking at his face to see if they knew him and then would be able to disavow any knowledge of knowing him.

By now, I’m sure someone has informed Mr. Knight’s camp of the identity of the shooter and if this man is not suicidal as I believe, then he should be escaping to the eye of Hurricane Katrina. That may be the only safe place for him right now. This situation reminds me of a line I heard in a movie the other night and it might be something I would say to the man who took a shot a Mr. Knight, “I wouldn’t give a plug nickel for your life right now.” I bet we will be hearing about an unidentified body that is floating in the ocean in the Miami area very soon. The only identifying characteristics will be a black man in a pink shirt with holes in it.

Lance Armstrong, the French, EPO, here we go again.

This post is just a punched up version of a post I made last week. I was pleased enough with it to work on it some more and turn it in as my column this week in the OC Times-News. Enjoy, again.



So, it is a scientific fact that Lance Armstrong has tested positive for the banned substance EPO. Or is it? According to a French newspaper it is true and the head of the Tour de France, Jean-Marie Leblanc, is all ready to string Armstrong up.

A lab has apparently tested some urine samples of Armstrong and the tests prove he was using EPO. At least the tests proved that to the newspaper and Leblanc. The lab says it cannot confirm that the samples were Armstrong’s and would have no way of knowing whose they were. The samples were anonymous.

At the time that these samples were taken there was not a test for EPO. Now that there is, the French have tested some frozen urine they believe to be Armstrong’s from 1999. It tested positive for EPO. Sounds like it should be pretty cut and dry, huh, not when it comes to the French.

The French have been after Lance Armstrong for years because, basically, they do not think that a man can survive cancer and win the Tour de France seven times. Maybe they also do not like an American dominating their sport.

It IS pretty unbelievable, and if the French didn’t seem like such sore losers, maybe I buy into this allegation. The urine samples that have been tested are from the 1999 Tour de France. It has been frozen all this time and is just now tested for EPO. That’s not all. These samples are the B samples. When giving urine for drug tests, the cyclists give two samples because there are so many things that can happen to contaminate a sample. The more samples you have, the better it is to get an accurate answer.

So if one sample tests positive for a banned substance, there is another sample to test to make sure that it is an accurate reading. The samples tested in this case were from 6 years ago. Can we really be sure that these tests are accurate? Can we really be sure this is Armstrong’s urine? How do we know that these samples have not been tampered with in the six years they have been frozen? Who has been in charge and taking care of these samples? Why are we testing urine six years after the fact? We may never know the answers to these questions.

These samples are anonymous, the urine sample in question did not have Armstrong’s name on it. The French claim they matched up numbers that were on the sample to numbers on a sheet with the cyclists names and the numbers are a match to Armstrong’s name.

After writing this all out, I am more convinced the French are just really sore losers and can’t let go of the past. They should be celebrating the fact that anyone outside of France even cares about their stupid little bike race. Maybe they don’t care if anyone wants to see their race.

I bet next year’s race will bring a high level of interest. I am sure every news channel, every newspaper, and every tourist will be there to witness Frenchy von French ride to victory. Well, that’s not true because even when Armstrong doesn’t race, the French can’t win.

I am a cynical guy and it would not surprise me to find out that Armstrong used a banned substance. In fact, I heard on a radio show that Armstrong did indeed take EPO, but it was part of his recovery.

Assuming this is indeed Armstrong’s sample, could this be what is popping on the alleged test? The French have been after Armstrong for years. Armstrong was tested more than anyone on the Tour de France. He has been hounded by many French newspapers, who all believe he is cheating.

He has never failed a test and I am sure that just fuels the haters’ desire to try anything to sully Armstrong’s good name. What he has done in coming back from cancer and being able to just live is a much bigger accomplishment than any yellow jersey.

Cycling is commonly known to be a sport rife with cheating. Everyone is trying to get an edge, which is just how it is in any sport. I don’t endorse cheating; it is just a fact of life. Many of us who say that cheating is wrong and we would never cheat don’t know what is going through these athletes’ minds.

I know that I personally would have to think long and hard about whether or not to take something I knew would make me better at my job and give me a chance to make millions of dollars. Many people would have to take a while to think things through. We all hope we would make the right decisions, but when it comes down to it, when face to face with it, would we? I’m not sure.

What if he did take EPO in 1999? Do the last six races not count? Has he not been tested for every banned substance, including EPO, since there has been a test for it? He has passed every one since then. If the cycling community were not testing for EPO at the time this sample was taken, should he be punished? If he indeed was using EPO in 1999, and let me be clear, that would be disappointing to hear, he is still a great athlete and has accomplished more than many cyclists could ever dream, EPO or no EPO.

What he accomplished is almost supernatural. There have been questions and accusations from the beginning, but none as serious as these latest accusations. He does need to answer these accusations, but what can he do other than to deny them?

I do not believe that he should go before Congress and testify like some have said. We already have seen how much weight the threat of testifying before congress under oath carries. Ask Rafael Palmero if he would lie under oath to protect his career and his achievements.

Armstrong has already come out and blasted the French newspaper that started this and the Tour head official. That should be enough. If he wants to proceed with legal action that is another option he could take, and more power to him. Unless they can go back in time and test him, he is free and clear. The French just need to realize this and move on.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Hurricane Katrina... Yikes.

On Sunday afternoon's after we get home from church we usually watch a little TV after eating lunch. Most times it's an eclectic mix of the Food network and sports, but today MSNBC, CNN and the Weather Channel ruled the day.

I'm not sure if you have been keeping up with it, but Hurricane Katrina, which was a category 1 storm as it crossed Florida, has grown into a "cat 5" as they say in the business and some are calling it a 5 and a half storm. And it's heading for the soup bowl of the country, New Orleans.

I was glued to the TV for about 2 solid hours watching this and Fox News had the graphic that best showed what New Orleans is. On one side to the north you have a gigantic lake. Lake Ponchatrain or something like that. Well it has a levee system to keep the water out since the lake is practically on the ocean. Then to the south of New Orleans you a tiny river we like to call the Mississippi. It too is levied and is a little higher than the lake levee.

In the center of this levee system is New Orleans which is 12 feet below sea level. They are talking about 20-40 feet of flood water coming into the city. Now since this is the 21st century, the city does have a sophisticated pumping system to pump out flood water since it is a bowl. Unfortunately, the pumps send the water out into the lake which is levied lower than the river levee meaning as long as water is coming in, the water pumped out will come right back in.

And on top of that, if too much water comes in the pump system won't work and they'll just have to take in the water until it quits so they can open levee gates to let some of it run out.

I believe it was the Weather Channel that was showing expected wind speeds as the storm progressed and they showed that when the storm hit Tennessee and here in Kentucky, they were expected to be in the 60 mph range.

Piccu and I couldn't believe that New Orleans is situated the way that it is. No offense to those of you who live there, but it's plain crazy the way the city is positioned between the largest river in the country and a lake the size of half the state of Rhode Island. And below sea level on the coast. It's basically one big storm drain.

Granted, nothing like this has really happened in at least 37 years, which was Hurricane Camille, but I believe the Weather Channel said that New Orleans has never taken a direct hit. So given the fact that New Orleans has never been hit directly by a storm out of the calm gulf waters, it still had to have been in the back of everyone's mind. You are talking about a major metropolitan area that could have business districts under as much as 10-20 feet of water depending on the lay of the land. The levees were built to withstand a fast moving category 3 storm according to a New Orleans official. This storm is currently a category 5 and its outer edge is already licking the coast of Louisiana and Mississippi.

The term "catastrophe" is thrown around loosely these days, but right now it looks like that may be the proper term for this event. Some are expecting New Orleans to be crippled for months while they try to get rid of the water. And lets not forget that they are looking at possibly 15 or more inches of rain on top of the storm surge.

As of 20 minutes ago the seas had risen over 5 feet at a coastal port and they expected another 15-20 more feet when the storm hits. And the way Lake Ponchatrain is situated the storm surge could blow right into it's spillway from the ocean.

For lack of a better way to put it, this is history in the making and the entire world will be watching it unfold on their TV's and computers.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Video game movies...

I jetted over to Yahoo! Movies and I noticed that everyone's favorite eyebrow, The Rock, is going to be in the next video game movie Doom.

Now there have been some pretty terrible video game movies before. I think they made Street Fighter into a movie. I'm not sure that it actually made it to the theater, but I have seen it on one of the movie channels on the satellite. The biggest problem with that game was that it was a Nintendo game and Nintendo games are generally for the kiddies.

Successful video game movies include Lara Croft: Tomb Raider and I guess the sequel along with Resident Evil and its sequel. I'll be the first to say that a lot of people probably didn't like them and I know that the second Tomb Raider wasn't that great, but to those of us who are game geeks, we were quite entertained.

I have yet to see the original Resident Evil, but I did see the sequel and I really liked it. It's not something I would watch over and over, but it was an action flick and action flicks are kind of like horror movies used to be. They were never made.

Now we had Doom coming out with The Rock and even everyone's favorite here at "the Affect", Transporter 2. I'm not going to say either of these film are going to be that great, but I'll guarantee you that I'll be entertained because if you go in not looking for wall to wall action, you are wasting your time.

Merlin, his wife, Piccu and myself action went to see The Transporter in the theatre. While Merlin and his wife didn't like it, Piccu and I were alright with it. We kind of let on that we thought it was the second coming of The Godfather, but it wasn't bad.

All I know about the Doom movie is that in the synopsis the term "armed to the teeth" was used.

That's what I like to hear.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Whippet, Whippet good.

My wife and I are further taking the dive into pet ownership. We have been exploring the possibility of a dog that is 20-40lbs, energetic but will not devour a leather couch when alone for an hour, and friendly toward visitors. Much of our exploration has led as to the Whippet. For any whippet enthusiasts out there, please excuse my butchered explanations. My understanding is that there are three sizes of greyhounds: Greyhound (65-90 lbs), Whippet (20-40 lbs), and Italian Greyhounds (<20lbs). Italian Greyhounds often have multilple difficulties health-wise due to ....shall I say a previously shallow gene pool.

Now don't get me wrong, I do realize many pet owners are on the edge of insanity. My parents are a decent example though by far not the worst; but I digress. Some of the hoops you have to jump through with this whole process include an application. Application? What the hell is this, admission to college? The first person was bit snotty so I just left the ball in there court and marched on taking my whippet business elsewhere. The second person was much friendlier though a bit guarded as well stating that they find "good homes" for the dogs they sell and not just give them to the first people that have a wad of cash. I could swallow that explanation a bit better. So far though I am trying to determine how big a wad of cash is necessary.

In the same vicinity of insanity over pets, there was a discussion on Bob and Sheri's radio show the other morning. They were discussing this pet hotel. You may be envisioning a shelter to keep your pet in for a few days when you're out of town; you'd be wrong. This is reportedly a lavish and pricey place where your pets go to shack up. That's right, breeding ground. Call me crazy, but I don't envision a dog needing to "get in the mood." And what's worse, people are actually paying for this!

Lance Armstrong, even in retirement he is hounded by the French.

So, it is a scientific fact that Lance Armstrong has tested positive for the banned substance EPO. Or is it? According to a French newspaper it is true and the head of the Tour de France, Jean-Marie Leblanc, is all ready to string Armstrong up. A lab has apparently tested some urine samples of Armstrong and the tests prove he was using EPO, at least to the newspaper and Leblanc. The lab says it cannot confirm that the samples were Armstrong’s. At the time the samples were taken, there was not a test for EPO. Now that there is, the French have tested some frozen urine of Armstrong’s from 1999. It tested positive for EPO. Sounds like it should be pretty cut and dry, huh, not when it comes to the French.

The French have been after Lance Armstrong for years because, basically, they do not think that a man can survive cancer and win the Tour de France seven times. It IS pretty unbelievable, and if the French didn’t seem like such sore losers, maybe I buy into this allegation. The urine samples that have been tested are from the 1999 Tour de France. It has been frozen all this time and just now tested. That’s not all. These samples are the B samples. When giving urine for drug tests, the cyclists give two samples because there are so many things that can happen to contaminate a sample. The more samples you have, the better it is to get an accurate answer.

Two samples are taken because a sample can be contaminated. So if one sample tests positive for a banned substance, there is another sample to test to make sure that it is an accurate reading. The samples tested in this case were from 6 years ago. Can we really be sure that these tests are accurate? Can we really be sure this is Armstrong’s urine? These tests are anonymous, the urine sample did not have Armstrong’s name on it. The French claim they matched up the numbers on the sample to the numbers on a sheet with the cyclists names and the numbers are a match to Armstrong’s name.

After writing this all out, I am more convinced the French are real a-holes and can’t let go of the past. They should be celebrating the fact that anyone outside of France even cares about their stupid little bike race. I bet next year’s race will bring a high level of interest. I am sure every news channel will be there to witness Frenchy von French ride to victory. Well, that’s not true because even when Armstrong doesn’t race, the French can’t win.

I am a cynical guy and it would not surprise me to find out that Armstrong used a banned substance. In fact, I heard on a radio show that Armstrong did indeed take EPO, but it was part of his recovery. Could this be what is popping on the test? The French have been after Armstrong for years. Armstrong was tested more than anyone on the Tour de France. He has never failed a test. What he has done in coming back from cancer and being able to live is a much bigger accomplishment than any yellow jersey.

Cycling is commonly known to be a sport rife with cheating. Everyone is trying to get an edge, that is just how it is. I don’t endorse cheating; it is just a fact of life. In fact, here I go again, what if he did take EPO in 1999? Do the last six races not count? If the cycling community were not testing for this substance, should he be punished? Does this take away from the six other races he won in which he never tested positive?

What he accomplished is almost supernatural. He does need to answer these accusations, but what can he do other than to deny them? I do not believe that he should go before Congress and testify like some have said. We already have seen how much weight the threat of testifying before congress under oath carries. Ask Rafael Palmero if he would lie under oath to protect his career and his achievements. Armstrong has already come out and blasted the French newspaper that started this and the Tour head official. That should be enough. Unless they can go back in time and test him, he is free and clear. The French just need to realize this and move on.

ESPN Hollywood, the latest symptom of a fast spreading sickness.

What is going on with the world these days? If you are faithful readers of this site, you know that I have written about how MTV and VH1 are frauds because they no longer show music videos. I am not going to go so far as to say ESPN and all its spin off channels are frauds, but I am growing very uncomfortable with the direction it seems to be taking.

ESPN is a sports channel, THE sports channel according to some. If this is the case, then why do I have to put up with a show about sports and Hollywood? How often does Vin Diesel end up hanging with Peyton Manning? What am I supposed to be seeing on this ESPN Hollywood? I imagine that there is nothing but fluff pieces, staged fluff pieces. Unlike most people I don’t want to introduce Justin Timberlake to Michael Vick to see how much they have in common. I really don’t care if Vick has always wanted to sing and Timberlake has always wanted to be black, now let’s give them a chance to live out their dreams. It is not something that I think ESPN needs to waste its time on.

Who is this show for? I assume it is for women because as crazy about pop culture and entertainment as I am, I am not penciling in time to watch an entertainment show. I am not sure that women are going to be a huge demographic for ESPN no matter what program they show. This ESPN Hollywood is the latest symptom of ESPN going soft.

Face it, we all see it coming. Sports are not enough, but they are good enough for me. Give me more shows like PTI, Around the Horn, even Quite Frankly. I may be in the minority, but I think Stephen A Smith is one of the most entertaining analysts on TV. He deserves a show, maybe not an hour every night, but he does entertain. Give us shows that discuss sports, not shows that try to turn sports into made for TV movies or Entertainment Tonight on sports. Give your fans a little credit. I know ESPN just wants to increase its viewership in order to bring in more ad revenue, that’s fine, that’s business. Just don’t try to change things so much that you lose the viewers who have been with you from the start and made you what you are.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Jump on the Ohio County Lady Eagle bandwagon.

As you have probably noticed over the many weeks I have been writing for the Times-News, I try to shy away from local sports and stick with the national sports scene or fake sports scene. The reason for this is because it is easier to criticize and, essentially, make fun of national sports. If I were to rip or make fun of local sports I would be run out of town on a rail. Today, I am going to write about local sports and I can already feel the hair standing up on some people’s arms. Some may be ready for a fight and I may be walking right into the firing line.

This past week started the fall sports season and I would like to implore people to support their local sports teams. I know many already support the football team. Ohio County is known throughout the region for having a great traveling fan base. Why else would OC be invited to a season opening bowl game in Elizabethtown? Because those who organized the event knew that the Eagles would bring carload after carload of rowdy fans, and from what I understand that was the case.

I am not here to talk about football; I am here to talk about soccer. Now before you stop reading and wad up the paper and set it on fire, hear me out. I can’t help but feel like people are overlooking a major opportunity to jump on a bandwagon. Many do not jump on the soccer bandwagon because they “hate” soccer or soccer “isn’t a sport.” Well, I believe that shouldn’t stop you from rooting for a winner and having a chance to rub other school’s noses in the fact that our soccer program, which has been around for just a few years, is beating programs that have been in existence for decades. We are talking about a team that destroyed Apollo this past Thursday night. As far as I am concerned I will root for any team that whips an Owensboro school.

Some of you may believe that people do not “hate, hate” soccer, but I beg to differ. I somehow ended up with a soccer shirt that I wear quite often, mainly because a shirt is a shirt and I like the looks it draws. (I will admit, I am an instigator.) I walked past a man one day who after seeing my shirt was highly offended and actually yelled, “I wouldn’t wear it if I got it for free.” You may think I am joking, but I promise you I am not. This man was incensed when he saw I was wearing a soccer shirt. That moment really opened my eyes.

Why do people hate soccer so? I have a theory and it is a theory as old as time. We hate what we don’t understand. We fear what is different. We fear change. I admit I am not the biggest soccer fan in the world and I may never be, but I can go to a game and enjoy it and root on my team.

My brother is ga ga over soccer. He wasn’t always like this, but when the Lady Eagles started and he had to go to the games to take pictures, he really got into it. He read up on it so he could better understand what was going on. I like to pride myself as someone who does not fear change; I love the latest gadget and technology that comes out and love to try something new and different. When it came to soccer I didn’t understand it and I wanted nothing to do with it.

Then I went to a game and horrors of horrors, I realized that it wasn’t bad. My world didn’t come crashing down. I actually enjoyed it. In fact that season I went to more soccer games than I did football or basketball games and my friends will tell you that I am practically a hermit and hate going anywhere.

I think that if you go and check out a game you will find that you may like it too. The game of soccer is like a good suspense movie. Compare soccer with Rear Window, Alfred Hitchcock’s classic movie and one of my personal favorites.

There is a moment in the movie where things start to get very hairy and you are on the edge of your seat, you are digging your nails into the cushion and you just want to start yelling at the characters on the screen to help them. Imagine that happening about a hundred times in a soccer game.

This aspect of the game can be frustrating, but I understand it. In the long run this is the sport of soccer. One team will be knocking on the door and ready to score and then the other team stops them and gets the ball back and then they get close to scoring and back and forth it goes. Finally a team will break through and score and after all the defense that has been played, you really appreciate what they go through just to get one goal. All the while, these girls are running and running and running. Those of you who say soccer is not a sport, quit watching NASCAR, quit watching golf, and quit watching poker and come out a watch a real sport.

Here’s my idea, try out a few games. Try two home games and one away game. Give soccer a test run. Look in our very own Times-News for a schedule of upcoming games and mark a few down to go see. Then find someone who knows a little about the game to help you understand what is going on. If you are the social type just go to the game and ask questions, I am sure those in the stands who have followed the team since inception would be glad to coach a new fan along. I never even tried to learn exactly what was going on, you can pick it up on your own and enjoy the game as you learn. I am sure the Lady Eagles will appreciate anyone who comes out to see the games.

Take the three game soccer challenge and I believe you will find that soccer isn’t the devil’s work as you once thought. I am not saying to stop supporting football or basketball or golf or any other sport. I am just trying to help you catch on to the sport of the future in Ohio County. This team is already ranked in the top 25 in the state. Get with the program and ride this OC Lady Eagle soccer bandwagon into a special season.

Monday, August 22, 2005

The paparazzi is at it again, more than likely not the last time

I just read a small blurb about Scarlett Johansson crashing her car into another while trying to escape photographers who were chasing her. This isn’t the first time something like this has happened. A few months ago, Lindsay Lohan was also involved in a car accident, when a photographer actually crashed into her to stop her so he could get a picture. Where does this stop? Even the death of Princess Diana couldn’t stop this apparently.

I don’t care if these idiots want a picture of Britney Spears shopping for groceries, but when they start to endanger the public, I think something should be done. The stars have brought this on themselves. They may not want to be famous, but this goes with the territory when you become a well known figure in the entertainment industry. Many of us who aren’t making millions of dollars would be happy to be chased by the paparazzi, but Joe Schmo didn’t ask to be involved in car chases between celebrities and overzealous photographers. I would like to think that the law could do something about these morons who cause these accidents to happen, but I see a growing trend when it comes to these incidents. Hopefully we won’t have to wait for someone to be killed or seriously hurt before something is done.

Hate mail is awesome: part deux.

Well, it has finally happened. I got some hate mail. I mean an actual letter, from a preacher no less. I don’t think I will respond in the newspaper because I just don’t want to turn my little column into a point/counterpoint type affair. So I decided to let you in on a few of the gripes he had and answer them.

Apparently the good reverend was offended by my latest steroid column. I think he thought I was condoning the use of steroids. I think I said I would never condone the use of steroids, I did. I think I said someone would have to be crazy to inject something like that into their bodies, I did.

He also seemed to be mad that I called Canseco a kook and I didn’t believe his book when it first came out. I shouldn’t have to defend that. Have you seen the Surreal Life on VH1 starring a one Mr. Jose Canseco? He has already dressed in women’s clothing twice on the show and has proclaimed his love for lip gloss and wishes men could wear it all the time. A little kooky, huh?

As for not believing Canseco’s book when it first came out, who did? This was a man who had a ball bounce off of his head and go over the fence for a home run. This is a guy who claims the game of baseball has blacklisted him from the game, when many who let him try out for them late in his career have claimed he was lazy and thought he deserved to make the team for what he had done and not for how hard he tried. This was a man who wasn’t taken seriously even before he wrote this book. I even questioned my own judgment in not believing Canseco at first. I now am leaning more to his side, as are many.

The fact that I commented about how Canseco committed the unforgivable sin of ratting out his former teammates, the reverend couldn’t understand how I could feel that way. I think we all know that I am not the only one who feels that way about the locker room. There may be some crazy things going on, but we all know that teammates protect teammates and when one breaks the confidence of the locker room, he is never looked at the same way again. This is nothing new.

I realized when I wrote the piece that I contradicted myself in it, but that was how I felt. The good reverend pointed out that I couldn’t have things both ways in the case I said I could be entertained by someone, but I didn’t have to respect them. I know that is contradictory, but I believe it is true and that is how I felt and if I want things both ways, I can have it. I like some Michael Jackson songs and think he, at one time, was a musical genius, but I sure as heckfire don’t respect him very much. Many of us may feel this way about entertainers. Entertainers are supposed to do just that, entertain us, not raise our kids or shape our morals or beliefs.

The good reverend wanted me to take the moral approach and I thought I did for the most part. I think he brought up some good points, but I feel how I feel; I believe that I am not the only one who felt that way about things.

I said I worked on a don’t ask, don’t tell policy and if I remember correctly, back in the summer of 98 when Sosa and McGwire and even Luis Gonzalez were blasting home run after home run, we weren’t clamoring to find out if they were “juiced.” We were content just to enjoy the show. I believe that the majority of fans still feel that way

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Woodstock Weekend...

For those of you who don't have VH1 Classic on your satellite or cable, they have been showing Woodstock the movie all weekend followed by a Dick Cavett Show that interviewed some of the musicians right after it happened. VH1 Classic is a pretty cool little channel in that they show nothing but music videos and concerts and things like this all of the time.

I haven't been able to catch all of the movie and in fact I haven't see all of it if only collectively. It's a neat little film since considering how much work had to go into it. No telling how much it cost to make. Granted it wasn't a big budget movie, but film itself is expensive, much less the cameras and crew. Today you could buy 10 high quality HD digital video cameras for what it most likely cost for just the undeveloped film used back in '69.

However, what struck me about the film was all of the interviews they did during the movie. They talked to a lot of young people and they all loved to talk. And they were trying to come off as intellectuals since they had probably gotten high on the campuses of many of our best institutions of high learning. But the funny part about most of them is that they would contradict themselves on every subject they spoke about if given enough time. Especially if someone around them would throw in their 2 cents. They loved to try to explain the world and why they were there more than the cast members of the Real World love to explain how they came to be who they are. Or more importantly, what they're about. Even though you never really hear what they are about, so much as what they are not "about".

And lastly, the other thing that really interests me about this movie is what do these people who were interviewed and who talked for 10 minutes about the study of yoga that can get you high, tell their children when they see them?

Like the two guys who were asking the guys filming about why the media isn't reporting about the "Man" and his airplanes seeding the clouds to make it rain? Why didn't they report about that, man?

Or better, the three long haired dudes walking down a muddy path buck naked when they are stopped and are asked questions about the concert. How can they tell their kids not to do this or that? They were at Woodstock and probably drove a thousand miles to a concert where there wasn't enough food or clean water for ticket holders much less the people that crashed the party.

Here is how that little showdown would go:

Dad: Are you high?

Kid: I just tried at little pot.

Dad: That's it, you are grounded until you can actually score some good weed in college!

Kid: Well at least I wasn't interviewed while stoned and naked in a rain storm at Woodstock in a documentary that has been seen by the entire world!

Dad: ... Touche.

Excuses, Excuses, Excuse.

I have taken a partial hiatus from the world of Incongruent-Affect for a few reasons.

1. despite news worthy things to put my two cents on (fat or fab dove girls, my agreement for little George to stay away from that protesting group despite my disagreement with little George in general, BTK and his complete and total narcissism, the list goes on and on) I have had one that just really grabbed me and motivated a post

2. I am finishing a week of call today which has sucked up a bit of free time

3. I started studying for Step 3 of the boards, which for you non medical folk is that last test I will ever take that doesn't have to do with psychiatry/neurology (no more obgyn is a great thing)

4. I have become a socialite in our culde sac also sucking up time, but man the deer burgers were so worth it. The neighbors are all awesome. One couple is expecting a baby this week, which will keep my wife occupied.

5. I have been mentally emotionally preoccupied with recent health difficulties in my family. I will elaborate on this if for no other reason to ask sincere favors of Piccu and Bratch. My father has had diabetes for the past 25 years requiring constant insulin. As you may or may not know there are many complications with chronic diabetes when your blood sugar is not closely maintained. One of these problems is kidney failure. My father is faced with this now. Fortunately, at this point it is a bad set of labs essentially. i realize it is much more, but should explain that I mean he feels very much like normal. I was initially extremely concerned about his making int to dialysis and getting all of that straightened out in the beginning. Fortunately that has been handled this week and the plan is solid and he is happy withit. The second concern is with his mental well being. I realize in the future, how near I don't know, he will be off work on temporary disability. He is an introvert by nature, but enjoys social interaction at his work. That will be eliminated when he goes on disability. I have been strongly encouraging him to go to the greatest little methodist church in any community (some of you know it as liberty). Further to get involved a do some of the fellowship activities. I am pushing from this side and would extremely appreciate help pulling from the other side.

6. We have been contemplating taking the next step in expanding the family........ ..... that's right a dog. We are still up in the air, but we are rolling it around in our head.

7. Oh, and recently I have finally convinced my wife to take the dive and watch old movies. There was a Cary Grant marathon that I DVRed. We watched Walk, Don't Run which was entertaining. I watched the end of "Bringing up Baby" which is hilarious with the most manic Katherine Hepburn and the most exasperated Cary Grant; a must see. I also watched Operation Petticoat which had some pretty funny parts.

So there are my excuses take them or leave them.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

So tonight is the night...

It all begins for me tonight. This is what businessmen would refer to as their "busy season". Tonight the soccer season begins and Saturday the football season begins. That means my life revolves around football, soccer and volleyball from now until basketball season and then basketball season goes until nearly April when baseball picks up.

I guess I'm pretty much still in school. When school starts, I actually have to start working a lot more. I didn't get a chance to shoot but maybe 3 total games last year of football and soccer with my beloved Nikon D70. But this year I'll probably shoot around 1,500 to 2,000 photos and still find time to broadcast 5 soccer and 5 or 6 football games on the radio this season.

Although the broadcasting part is just fun. The soccer is a little tiring since it never stops, but the football will be a blast when my buddy and I get going. Lord knows what will happen.

Probably the highlight of my illustrious broadcasting career was when I was broadcasting a football game that was a road game for our team. We were up in the plush press box chowing down on Papa John's pizza and we had just finished the first half and were going into our half time extravaganza.

It happened to be homecoming at the particular high school where my partner and I were broadcasting and the homecoming candidates were all riding in convertibles out on the track.

So throughout the broadcast during breaks we had chatted about how goofy that particular school's mascot looked. And it turned out that the mascot, which was a panther, was riding with the reigning homecoming queen in a T-Bird convertible.

This was my first broadcast ever and I was kind of freaking out in the beginning, but by this time I had settled in and realized that no one was probably listening anyway. And even though color commentators are typically supposed to know something about football, it's not really required. I just make it up as I go.

So the cars are coming around the track and my partner, while on the air and obviously drunk on Papa John's pizza, says, "Looks like the panther got himself a homecomin' hoochie."

It was at this point that I thought, "Dear God, everyone is listening!" But that was followed by fought laughter and a silent wish for a dump off to commercials that didn't come true. I had flashes of Charlie Steiner completely breaking down on Sportscenter and not being able to stop.

I was trying to find some words to say, but they weren't there. He's the play-by-play man so that means I'm supposed to expound on his observations and everything I could come up with in my head definitely wasn't going to help the situation.

What I finally came up with was, "I don't think... I would call her... that."

See that was back when we wanted to try and make the broadcast seem really professional like we were going to get picked up by ESPN to do their broadcasts. Now we just broadcast like we are a couple of idiots watching a game.

It works because it isn't too far from the truth.

Summertime Movietime pick: Suddenly, Last Summer

My Summertime Movietime pick this week is a movie entitled Suddenly, Last Summer. This movie stars Katharine Hepburn, Elizabeth Taylor and Montgomery Clift. This film is based upon the Tennessee Williams play and if you have seen or read many of Williams’ plays, you know they can tend to get a little crazy. This movie is a lot of crazy. Katharine Hepburn is a mother whose son dies when he is traveling in Europe with his cousin played by Elizabeth Taylor. Taylor’s character goes crazy after the death of her cousin and Hepburn is trying to get her lobotomized to cover up the truth.

This movie is so crazy. Not just because of the story, but because there is very little action in this picture. Most of the action is listening to the conversations that are explaining things that you never see. The cousin, who died, Sebastian, is never actually on screen, but you feel like he is a real character, as real as those who are talking about him. You can piece things together as the film goes along, but you never realize what exactly has been going on until the end and then you wish you had never found out.

Hepburn and Taylor are both amazing and deservedly received Oscar nominations for their performances. This film is very disturbing and a little scary. Anyone who likes the edge of your seat films will like this one.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

People hate them some soccer

High school soccer season hasn't even started yet and people are already complaining. I just can't even begin to understand why people have so much hate for soccer. And after today I'm pretty sure that where I live the boys' soccer people hate the girls' soccer people.

But the funniest part about it is that the girls' soccer organization here is the hardest working group in the county and I think that is why a lot of people hate them. Our local high school allocates about $900 for the entire girl soccer program. That $900 is for uniforms, shoes, balls, goals, refs all season and anything else they might need. Instead of spending that money the coaches give it back to the high school and this season is looking to spend about $20,000 of the money they raised themselves on their program. No other sports organization in can even begin to touch it around here.

I'm not going to say that I am a huge fan of soccer, but I can watch our local girls' team all day long because they are good. And being in the newspaper business, it's great because it's a story fit for a movie.

This is the third year of varsity soccer at the local high school. The first year that the girls got to play they only had 13 players. Since you have to have 10 players plus a goalkeeper on the field to start the game, that gave them 2 players for substitution. Not only did they have a winning season, but they became instant contenders in a district where the other 4 teams are in a city that has twice the population of our county. And each school probably has had soccer program for 15 or 20 years.

Last season, their second, despite a ton of injuries the made it into the top 25 in the state. A rarity if you don't play in Lexington or Louisville. They beat a top 10 ranked school and they had two players elected to the All-State soccer squads.

This season looks to be their best season yet since they have more players and some freshmen who have been chomping at the bit to play varsity. Since soccer is full-contact you have to be in high school to play varsity. The best thing about the JV squad is that until this year they had some JV starters that were still in elementary school. These girls who were sometimes 6 inches to a foot shorter than their competition of sophomores and juniors in high school would pound them.

What people don't realize that if they had 3 players go down they would have had to shut down the program that first year. And going into district play they were down to one player on the bench when one broke her foot. What they've done here is the equivalent of starting a basketball team with 6 players or a football team with 13 and putting the fear of God into their opponents.

So now this season they are looking to win their first district and first regional title and advance to the state tournament, if all goes to plan. There aren't many schools, if any, that can say that. And this is a team in poor rural county in western Kentucky with a single public high school. And they are going to pound a team this Saturday that is from a school that has 4 times as many students as we do at our high school.

I just can't understand people around here. They've never even seen a soccer game in person. Some won't even call it a sport even though the girls who play soccer are the best athletes in the school, bar none. The few girls who play soccer and basketball run circles around opponents on the basketball court and when basketball is over they can't begin to get up and down the soccer field. Playing competitive basketball from December to nearly April all week long can't even keep them in soccer shape.

But then again soccer isn't a sport, is it?

A little drop of heaven.

Get ready everyone because the sequel to one of the most exciting action packed movies of all time is coming soon. That’s right; finally the “geniuses” who run Hollywood actually get it right. The Transporter 2 is coming soon to a theater near you.

Now I don’t know if you have seen the Transporter 1, but you really need to. It is a movie that everyone needs to see, like a Citizen Kane or a Wizard of Oz. It is hard to describe the wonder and joy that is the Transporter, but I will try.

There is a story, but you don’t need to know it. All you need to know is that a lot of people get their faces kicked off. Jason Statham is in fact, the transporter and he transports things, which is basically the plot. He ends up with a hot Asian chick who has a wondrous grasp of the English language and he kicks off faces while trying to protect her.

If that doesn’t fire you up, you have no pulse. I know that Merlin and his wife will agree, the Transporter is one of the greats in Hollywood history. You can rent this movie but I recommend running out and buying it as fast as you can. Watch it at least 100 times so its greatness can soak in.

The Transporter was so good I thought there was no way a sequel would be made because you shouldn’t tempt fate. The Transporter is like gossamer and one doesn’t dissect gossamer, one also doesn’t try to make a sequel to gossamer, but I saw the trailer yesterday and besides being the best trailer I have ever seen, I must admit that I am now chomping at the bit for the opportunity to see it. I am sure Merlin and his wife will be coming back to Kentucky so we can go and watch this together, just like we watched the first. Mark your calendars everyone, come September 2 the greatest movie in the last 5 years will debut and we should all thank our stars that it exists.

Fantasy football is here, time to dominate.

Dun-Dun-Dun Dun (to be sung to the tune of the Monday Night Football theme.) It is quickly becoming football season and if you are a faithful reader of my little column and I know at least 4 of you are, you know how I feel about football in 90 degree weather. Well, I must admit that I am actually looking forward to the football season. I say that every season, for every sport, but when the season starts I quickly lose interest, unless it is college basketball season and the Cats are playing. Nevertheless, I have a new reason to look forward to the upcoming football schedule. I am embarking upon my first fantasy football season.

Yes, they finally got me. I have been a fantasy sports player for years, just not football. I have dominated foes both known and unknown in basketball and baseball. The fun is quickly becoming lost in those sports because when you are the best at what you do, there is no challenge. I have even totally turned some off from the fantasy sports game because of my devastating run of excellence. I have decimated opponents left and right. It is time for a new challenge.

This challenge will be taken on by joining a fantasy sport in which I do not have a wide base of knowledge. I somewhat follow football and I find myself enjoying it at certain times of the season, but I wouldn’t call myself a stat head when it comes to the NFL. I will need to become one now. I have been invited to join a Yahoo custom league and I have just signed up. It’s on.

I will admit that I will need all the help I can get. I know the better players, but there has to be a strategy. There always is a strategy to win at fantasy sports. The biggest thing seems to be the drafting of a big time running back. This is because a running back will touch the ball 90% of the time, even if he should be bagging groceries instead playing in the NFL. To help me with my drafting, I have a cheat sheet. I got this in the mail from my favorite fantasy basketball source. They sent me a complete schedule and cheat sheet with rankings for every position. They were trying to get me to spend a few hundred dollars on their fantasy football game, but I think not. Why buy the football when you can play for free? Or something like that.

I am essentially going into this blind. I have never played this game and I don’t necessarily keep up with it. I need to figure something out to give me an edge; I believe I shall use my newly patented “Five Prong Attack” for fantasy football.

Prong 1: I will use my cheat sheet to rank my players, hoping that this set of rankings is better than any of the other 6 million rankings I could use out there. This way I won’t fill my head with so many rankings and too much analysis that I freeze up come draft time. This also plays into my affinity for laziness and extreme disdain for research.

Prong 2: I may enter another team into the league under an assumed name. This way, I will have a larger talent pool and I will be able to trade players with myself and build a super team. Truth be told I am entered in the league now under an assumed name, but you keep that under your hat. When it comes to email addresses, I like to stay off the grid so to speak. I don’t want anyone to have my real email address or my real name, so I won’t get email that I don’t want. For this reason, I have a fake email with an assumed name. So my team is currently owned by Dr. Ron Mexico of Atlanta, Georgia. I may enter under my own name and claim to have invited Dr. Mexico into the league, so that I may not arouse suspicion. Then, let the trading begin!

Prong 3: I will add and drop and add and drop and add and drop until I can finalize a team that will win. I don’t know if there is a good add and drop strategy in fantasy football. There is one good late season add drop strategy for fantasy baseball.

Get real close to the paper and make sure no one is looking and I will share it with you. This is really effective in a Yahoo baseball league. To pile up wins and strike outs you just add a couple starting pitchers everyday and in turn drop a couple of starting pitchers everyday. This gives you 2 or 3 chances for wins every day and the opportunity for around 15 k’s a day. Assuming you have a good offense, that is two guaranteed pitching stats you can win. Keep this on the down low because some will assume this as a way of cheating. I like to think of it as taking advantage of every opportunity available.

Prong 4: I may just turn over my team to a professional fantasy football player. If I find myself floundering or even foundering in this league, I will pay someone to take on the responsibility of attaining a first place finish for me. This is what I like to refer to as fantasy sub contracting. Usually I am the one being called on to turn a team into a winner, but that is in baseball and basketball.

Prong 5: If the going gets too tough and I decide against hiring a professional, I will probably just go in the tank. I will not mess with the team until the playoffs start and then claim that I was cheated when I do not win. This line of defense has served me well in the past, and I see no reason why it won’t work here.

There it is, my plan to dominate and devastate this season in fantasy football. You can use my patented “Five Prong Attack” for your own, as long as you give me the credit for your win. If you lose, you obviously did not utilize the “Five Prong Attack” correctly and I will assume no responsibility for your loss. So to all those playing fantasy football this season, good luck, and for those playing against me, you are going to need it.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Survivor 162 cast named...

This is more up Piccu's alley, but I was sifting through the news when I saw that they had announced the cast for Survivor: Guatamala. I think this is the 162nd season of Survivor, but that's really only a ballpark figure.

The funny thing about this article is that one of the contestants is an ex-NFL quarterback.

That being said, there is no way he is going to win and he's ignorant for even applying. He obviously thinks that he'll be able to skate by for a month without anyone finding out he's Jebadiah Hogeboom. I can't remember his first name. Pete or Chuck? No, it's Gary. You all remember him he was that guy who played for that team.

Anyway, he's never going to be able to get through the time and I'm sure he's going to be a threat right off because NFL quarterbacks aren't 6 feet tall and weigh 170 pounds. They are like 6 foot 4 and weigh about 230 pounds. Just being there is a strike against him.

And the other thing he's obviously not taking into consideration is that around day number 7 Jeff Probst is going to say before a challenge, "Hey do you think this is worse than NFL TRAINING CAMP?"

Then the other cast members will ask him if he wants to get voted out later or just walk away right then.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

TN fugitives captured. Woman charged with murder and grand idiocy.

Well, it’s all over, law enforcement officials have captured the fugitives that have been on the run for the last few days, caught them in our neck of the woods. Of course, the fugitives never got close to our hometown, but they were in the state of Kentucky. If you hadn’t heard, this story began at a Tennessee courthouse, where the wife of a fugitive who was at a hearing, waited outside of the courthouse for her husband to exit and ambushed the guards leading him away. She killed one of the guards and escaped with her husband and went on the run. Police found a stolen van used by the couple in Erlanger, KY yesterday and it was only a matter of time before they captured them. Today police captured them after a cab driver called them to say he had earlier dropped them off at a motel in Columbus, OH.

I had heard about this story on the Nashville news that I watch just about every morning, but got even more interested when I saw the report on CNN last night. It showed the van they found at a motel in Kentucky. When you see that the two most wanted fugitives in the country are in your home state, you peck up a bit. The problem with the report was that CNN never told us where in Kentucky they were. We watched for about 5 to 10 minutes and they kept telling folks to be careful in this area because the fugitives were armed and dangerous. Unfortunately, they forgot to tell the folks the location they should be careful in. I had to go to the net to find out if I should be worried or not.

You hear about a high profile prison escape about once or twice a year. You know the type, a group of murderers escape or just a story about an ingenious way criminal has escaped by tying bed sheets together and sliding down the barbwire fence. This one was different. This one involved the wife waiting for the right opportunity to ambush the guards and escape with her husband. She accomplished that and in the process caught a bullet in the leg for her trouble. Then they were on the run. I’m not so sure they thought things through, though.

The plan to free her husband worked but they seemed to be just wandering around after that. It’s as if she thought the first part of the plan wouldn’t work. They didn’t think ahead as to how they would make it out of the country or where ever the heck they were headed. Taking cabs when both of your faces are all over CNN doesn’t seem to be the best idea. Especially when the fugitives the police are looking for are a black man and his red haired white wife. In Kentucky and Ohio, that might stick out a little bit. Even mixed couples who aren’t on the run from the law will get stares in this area. Besides the fact that this woman killed a man, that’s the biggest problem I have with these two morons, they didn’t know what they were doing after they got away.

This woman loved her husband so much; she was willing to kill or be killed to get him free. Fortunately, both of these people are so stupid that they must have thought they had a chance to get away. Unless they were millionaires and had a private jet waiting to whisk them to Brazil, I think we all know they had no chance. Where did they think they could go? Did they not think that the national news media wouldn’t grab a hold of this run with it? CNN is always looking for a story to blow up and shove down our throats and this one was pretty big.

I think we can all agree that this woman is obviously the more stupid of the two because she married this guy. This isn’t a case of she married him and found out later that he was a bad guy and an armed robber. No, No, she was a prison nurse who met him in prison and then married him. She even lost her job because she was sneaking him food. If you are willing to kill for him, I can’t imagine losing a job over him is that big of a deal.

Maybe Merlin can help me out with this. Why do women fall for criminals? I don’t mean criminals as a whole, but criminals who are in prison at the time they start their romance. What makes them want to be married to someone in prison, in many cases for the rest of their lives? What kind of life is that? Why would a woman actively seek out a man in prison to marry? Many who do this are married and never see their husband outside of the prison walls and maybe that is what they want.

This woman, however, wanted her husband out and wanted to be a Bonnie to his Clyde apparently. I am not a big capital punishment fan, especially when there is a chance an innocent man or woman could be executed, but for these two morons, I think the quicker the better. If for no other reason than we don’t need the spawn of these two mental midgets walking the earth.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Being Bobby Brown... It's pretty scary

I've seen the show a few times, but I can never seem to finish one. See I'm the kind of person that feels embarrassed for people who have no idea how embarrassed they should be. And this kind of falls into that category.

The Osbornes were somewhat like this, but after a while you could tell that something may not have been quite what it seemed. Kind of like Viva La Bam is now on MTV. You kind of thought that they were scripting stuff, but now there's no doubt. It's still funny even though it's only funny when they are messing with each other.

Anyway, Being Bobby Brown is a show about former pop star (and I use that term loosely) Bobby Brown and his wife Whitney Houston. Also starring their child who will soon be in therapy.

While the show is promoted as being about Bobby Brown, it's actually more centered around the lifestyle of Bobby Brown that turned America's sweetheart, Whitney Houston, into a crackhead. Even though the receipts from her purchases of the crack still haven't surfaced.

And you do notice that things aren't right around the Brown Estate. You see Whitney sitting around sometimes fidgeting and restless and smoking cigarettes like they are soon going to be as out of style as she is. The do nothing but loaf and drink followed by arguments and yelling followed by more loafing and drinking.

And everyone remembers Whitney Houston as being that shy looking girl who made songs your mom would listen to. Now she looks and acts like a regular cast member of The Jerry Springer Show . And the worst part about this is that they wanted this. Those camera guys just didn't show up at Bobby Brown's house to film the carnage.

That's right folks, someone actually thought this would be a good idea and Bobby signed off on it. Someone said, "Hey Bobby, we would like to make a reality series based on your life. All of your crazy nights out on the town, any run-ins with the law you might have and the occational court appearance."

And Bobby replied, "Cool."

So now we get to see exactly what life is like when really stupid people get money. And some of the things they say are the best. My personal favorite was, following a court appearance where he got off easy, Bobby mentioned at a restaurant to the camera that he never wanted to have to go back to court for harming or threatening his wife.

Now I don't really have a problem with this statement on the surface, but generally I like to think that one of my goals in life is to not show up in court at all for any reason. It's noble for him to say that he doesn't want to hit his wife, or at least not get caught, but that means that everyone else is fair game at this point.

And I'm not comfortable with that.

Weekly snapshots of small town America.

As we have mentioned here at Inconguent-Affect, the writers are a bit diverse with a small town in western Kentucky holding them together (and family tree). Both Piccu and Bratch are involved in a weekly publication known as The Ohio County Times-News. This weekly paper is one of the best small town papers you will ever read. It continues to fill it's pages with increasingly interesting photographs and caption. I think this is the strongest part of the paper for a "lay" reader. You get to see a clear picture of the interworkings of a small town rural community. This not only done by quality photos, but also by improved writing. There is space reserved to here about who's child's birthday it is and whose 25th or 50th wedding anniversary has come up, but by and large there is a significant portion of "real" news. The commentaries are also increasingly interesting, and one of which you can read here on this blog by piccu. As in any small town, local sports dominate the local entertainment. This is proportionally so represented in the paper. My grandmother has given me a subscription to the paper since my move from the county. Although I do know many of the people in it. There are many I do not. Still, if you want to see how small town America operates then check it out. I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Sideshows, coming to an intersection near you?

I heard on NPR the other day about sideshows. Apparently, in Oakland, CA there are these underground car trick shows that take place late at night. It sounds like the word gets out where and when; then people just show up. There have been multiple complaints about the shows. For one is the obvious noise issue, if it is in your neighborhood. Another blanket issue is safety. I agree with the concept that people standing around only feet away from this is a bad idea. I saw one clip where people were inches away from the action. The interviews of the police further extrapolated increases in rape and sexual assault. I am not exactly clear if there is any data to support this or if this is one of those ghost stories for scaring people away.

Despite the risks and illegal-ness of the whole thing, I must admit it is pretty cool. One guy is now profitting off it with a film called "Sideways." Before you start saying that you don't remember that happening at any wine tasting, this is a different movie.

Check out the clips.

Monday, August 08, 2005

Problems I have with Wal-Mart

These problems might be exclusive to my local Wal-Mart, but I'm sure you'll all see something familiar.

First of all, why have 326 check out lanes if you are only going to have the two that are farthest from the door open?

I realize that when Christmas rolls around they'll all be open, but I was there not 10 minutes ago and what few lanes they did have open had lines stretching all the way back into the clothing area. This is about 35 feet from the promised land of actually paying so you can get out of the cattle chutes.

Second, why does Wal-Mart always stop stocking things you like?

This is mostly a food thing. We eat a lot of microwavable meals because they are easy and portable for work, but as soon as we find certain things we like having around, they'll stop stocking them. You would think that after we buy all they have, that super computer they have in Arkansas would get the picture that we dig that product and order some more.

Back to the check out lanes again. Why don't they have more 10 items or less lanes?

These particular lanes are what I like to refer to as "man lanes." These are the lanes that I covet because I would love for my Wal-Mart experience to be similar to a bank robbery. In and out in 90 seconds. If I thought packin' heat would help expedite the check out process, I would consider investing in a firearm.

For the most part the public doesn't really understand the 10 items or less line anyway. I've seen people roll up with 5 cartons of eggs, 2 twelve packs of soda, 6 two liters of soda and 3 packages of hamburger. To you and me that adds up to 16 items, but to the genius who picked these things out it's only 4 items. Just a lot of each one.

Another problem I have is that they put the items that people want the most as far away from the parking lot as possible.

I realize that this is good business because it will encourage impulse buying because customers have to walk past a thousand other things they may need to get to the milk. However, this is excruciatingly stupid in my town because we don't have anywhere else to get the stuff that cheap. And people around here are as cheap as they come.

There are a lot of things in Wal-Mart that we just wouldn't be able to get in this county without Wal-Mart. Therefore, they should make my Wal-Mart a little more stinkin' convenient. They even sell live bait at Wal-Mart. LIVE BAIT!

The little bait shops around my county probably made 4 bucks a day selling live bait, but that was 4 bucks that Wal-Mart just knew it had to have. And now if I go fishing I have to drive to Wal-Mart and walk to the back of the store to get what I used to be able to get about 30 seconds from where I actually planned on fishing.

I wish they would put a punching bag next to the door with little smiley face they have in the commercials on it so I could punch it in the face as I leave.

Steroids may end Hall of Fame career.

Just when you think it’s safe to enjoy a baseball game, Rafael Palmeiro tests positive for steroids. This is the same Rafael Palmeiro that I hyped up a few weeks ago saying he is a lock for the Hall of Fame and no one in their right mind should keep him out. Whoops!

We just may see that some in their right mind keep him out now. I am sure I am not the only one who thought Palmeiro was telling us the truth when he sat before Congress and pointed his finger at them saying he never took steroids, ever. He certainly looked better than Mark McGwire who basically torpedoed any goodwill he accrued from the summer of ’98 by laying down a thick coat of double talk. Palmeiro certainly looked better than Sammy Sosa, who apparently forgot how to speak English. Palmeiro certainly looked better than Jose Canseco who besides sitting with his lawyer squinting and flinching, “ratted out” his former teammates. A sin that is unforgivable in the sporting world. The locker room is like Vegas, what happens there, stays there.

It seems now that Palmeiro was the biggest liar of the bunch and Canseco looks to be the only one who was telling the truth. How scary is that? Why didn’t we believe him? Why didn’t baseball believe him? If baseball was really serious about stopping steroid use and punishing those who use them, why didn’t they use Canseco’s book to do it, instead of condemning him as a kook? He is a kook, but evidently he is a kook who is telling the truth and whether he wanted to or not, he is the man who might save baseball from itself.

The question is who looks like a bigger idiot, me and the public for buying what Palmeiro was selling, or Palmeiro for getting busted after his impassioned statement to congress? I believe Palmeiro to be the bigger idiot. He was busted with a steroid in his system that you just can’t get by drinking an orange smoothie. Stanozolol, or winstrol, is a pretty powerful steroid. Coincidently, that is the same steroid that Canseco claims in his book that Palmeiro was taking.

Palmeiro now says that he has never intentionally taken steroids. That looks like the same statement he gave before Congress, except for one important word. Assume for a split second Palmeiro is telling the truth, this time. How could he get this into his system? The most believable scenario is that he let a trainer or a doctor inject him with something that he either was told was something other than a steroid or he just didn’t want to be told what it was. If this is the case, Palmeiro needs to turn Canseco and rat out anyone he knows who takes or supplies steroids. This may be the only way to save his Hall of Fame career. Palmeiro was on shaky ground to begin with, but with this on his permanent record, I can’t see the voters allowing him into the Hall of Fame on the first ballot, if ever. If Palmeiro cares about his legacy, stained though it may be, he needs to do what he can to gain some trust and goodwill from the voters.

How do I feel about this steroid mess? Thanks for asking. In an earlier column I said I didn’t care if an athlete wanted to take steroids to entertain me and I still feel that way. People will always look for a way to get ahead, baseball just made it easier than any sport in the world. Just because I don’t care what a player chooses to do to entertain me, doesn’t mean that I will respect that player and his personal decisions.

I would never, ever condone the use of steroids, but I understand. Who among us would not consider taking a substance that we knew could get us a substantial raise at work or allow us to keep our job a few years longer. I know that I would have to think about it.

That being said, I think it’s crazy that someone would inject something into their body that scientists do not even know what the long term consequences could be. These players, at least in age, are mature adults. If they want to take their life in their hands and think it is worth it, who am I to tell them what to do? I just wonder if they even think about how many years this may be taking off their lives.

I guess when it comes down to it, I work on a don’t ask don’t tell policy when it comes to steroids, and before you judge, remember, up until a few months ago that was baseball’s policy as well. I am not against the baseball writers for keeping players out of the Hall of Fame that have been proven to have used steroids. Those people are cheaters and they will be dealt with in time.

Those who are only suspected of taking steroids, now that is a different colored horse. What do we do about Mark McGwire? We can’t go back in time and test him for steroids. Is it fair that he didn’t tell us anything when called before congress? No. Is it fair to be convicted as a steroid user without any proof? No, but I have a sneaking suspicion that any player in the “Era of Steroids” will be examined with a microscope, and I wouldn’t be surprised to see some big, big names skipped over a few times for entry into the Hall of Fame.

The one good thing to come out of this, at least for some, is that Pete Rose certainly has had the heat taken off of him. I wouldn’t be surprised to see Charlie Hustle make the Hall in the near future. I also wouldn’t be surprised to see that Rafael Palmeiro takes the fall for all those hitters who never tested positive for steroids, but have been suspected, by never getting into the Hall of Fame.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Record labels eyeballing podcasting...

It didn't take long after Apple added podcast subscribing to it's iTunes software before the record labels began to question how they are going to make money from it.

I was checking out Yahoo! News a few minutes ago and apparently there is a Seattle public radio station that is bringing in Indie and small record label bands to do live performances for its podcast. They have the bands sign a little contract giving the station permission to use the music for the podcast and they rock out.

Basically what this radio station did was figure out their own way to work around the recording industry. We all remember the Napster fiasco and while there are similarities, this is a different beast. Napster was just stupid. Revolutionary, but stupid. Whoever what's-his-face talked to about whether or not he was going to get his butt sued off, was a moron.

That's distribution, brotha.

Podcasting is a bit different. Sure there are some morons out there who will play some of their CD collection breaking all of the copyright rules out there, but for the most part, the podsafe music network is going to fly. Of course the proclaimed "podfather" Adam Curry is behind the music network, but he knows his stuff and he's trying to get it done right.

What really may need to happen before podcasters stop using illegal music in their podcasts is for a couple of podcasters to go down. I almost believe that is what the recording industry was doing with illegal mp3 music downloaders. They would sue the crap out of a few people in a given area and word would spread scaring the rest of us straight.

Most of the music I have heard on podcasts are from bands who are trying to make the big time. Which is good for the record labels. These little bands will go out and produce a CD or a few songs and send them out to podcasts. If they make the proper rounds and make the biggest podcasts, they'll generate buzz. Assuming it's good music of course.

They'll sell a few CDs through their website and make a little coin to really produce a good quality CD and then a record label will pick them up so they can mass produce the underground success and get a slice of the sales. Then the band will probably let a recording of their single to go out to the podcasting world so podcasters can play and plug them. Making them millionaires with the record labels getting their cut of someone else's creation.

Assuming the music is good of course.

Russian subs and digg.com

The only time you ever hear about a Russian submarine is when it ends up on the bottom of the ocean with many men looking at dying a horrible death. At some point you have to wonder if it's really worth it for the Russians. I'll bet they have to force soldiers at gun point to sign up for sub duty.

The last time we heard about a Russian sub there were many more lives lost than we are looking at right now. Now we are only talking about seven men, but some fisherman's net is the whole reason why they are in this mess. A fishing net!

My oldest brother was in the Marines back in the 80's and a Russian sub ran into the ship he was stationed aboard. I talked with him tonight and he has photos of the accident. I don't know that I ever knew much or thought much about it when it happened, but back then I'll bet it was a pretty tense situation given the climate of U.S./Russian relations at that time.

I'm hoping they can get that sub off of the bottom of the ocean, but it's going to be tough. It's under 625 feet of water and no man can go that deep or swim up from that depth.

On a lighter note, Piccu and I had lunch together today and when he walked into my office he asked me what I did to our little blog here. I asked him what he was talking about and he noted that this morning we had roughly 730 or so hits and by noon we were pushing 6,000.

So after snooping around we found out that one of my first posts on the blog back in May got linked up to a pretty cool website called digg.com. From there it sent a ton of people to this blog to read my little ramblings on the Hydristor and how it could help us keep the vehicles we love and double the gas mileage so we didn't have to drive those teeny little hybrids.

What happens at digg.com is the users/readers post stories they have found on blogs and other websites that they think are interesting. Somehow we got linked up there. I guess someone thought we were interesting.

So as the kids say, big ups and mad props to digg.com.

We were livin' the dream there for about 12 hours, but hopefully we picked up a few more readers who can stand reading our ramblings here at the Incongruent-Affect.

A taste of recent medical history.

In my line of work, I am blessed with hearing tons and tons of stories about peoples lives. Some of them are completely reliable and some of them.... well, let's say not so much. Either way they can be very entertaining.

I did recently have the opportunity to hear a story about a homosexual man who has had HIV since 1981!! To many of you that may mean very little, but let me assure there are not many people around that were diagnosed that long ago and are still doing well. At that time it was still called the "gay disease" or "gay pneumonia." It wasn't until ~1983 that AZT was remarketed as apotentially useful drug for HIV, after it's time in the early 6o's as a cancer drug.

The sensationalistic journey of this man and those others like him, is not one of common knowledge. Imagine, currently an HIV patient may take 4-5 pills a day. You may think, so what so people take more than that for blood pressure problems. That is, in fact, my point. Over the course of these patient's treatment, it was not uncommon to have to take multiple pills a day. So how many pills are too many for you? I take two vitamins a day, and I sometimes find that a small struggle. Would 15 pills be too much to ask? 25? 50? There was a time when this man, and others like him approache 100 pills per day. Let me repeat that: 100 pills per day.

Now, maybe all of this still means little to you. Let me give you a couple of other broad stokes with this brush. If you were to get pissed off, depressed, or let's say even just plain ole tired of taking this pills for a month or two; the result could be catastophic. The pills could then lose their efficacy for you. This man has diligently taken whatever HIV meds he has been told to take since 1985. I have seen people who have been diagnosed in the past several years in worse shape than this man. His viral load is nearly 0 and his T cell count is approaching 600 (for the non medical people, that's damn good).

I say stayed tuned. For better or worse, the medical field is going to continue to move forward with ever more rapid understanding and control. Other diseases will emerge and be treated in our lifetime. Who knows we might even cure one or two.

Exactly how did video games become a race issue?

This is one of those time where you just look around and say, "How in the heck did we get here?!?

Apparently there aren't enough minority video game programmers out there. I can honestly say I was unaware of this issue, but I can also say that it was somewhat expected in a country where 75 percent of the population is white.

The writer of this article says that in the wake of Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, that a growing number of people believe that there should be more black and hispanic heroes and heroines. In GTA: San Andreas the player of the game controls CJ who is black, and is a gangster in every sense of the word.

That being said, other than San Andreas I don't know of any other games where you play a black guy going around killing everyone you see. But I'm also not into gaming as much as I used to be. Maybe after I get a new HD big screen I'll buy some more.

So, it appears now that people are wanting to see more video game programmers who are minorities. In fact, two gentlemen have started the Urban Video Game Academy so that minorities can learn the basics of programming video games.

I don't have any problem with this, but the article that is linked in the title of this post somewhat paints a picture that white kids have access to all they would ever want to know about programming video games. I can't even fathom how hard it must be to program video games. And if some high school kid asked me where he could get a jump start in learning a little about making video games, I guess I would just have to point him to Urban Video Game Academy. It's the first place I've ever heard of that offered such an education that wasn't a college or university-type institution.

Now video game programming is being made out to be biased and racist in some ways. San Andreas was set in the inner-city and is also based back in the early 90's when gangsta rap was all the rage. So that's what was being done in the game. You do in the game what was being talked about in the music. Grand Theft Auto: Vice City was based back in the early to mid 80's in a Miami-like town where everyone was running guns or cocaine. The music is what made these games great. Not that 80's music was about running guns.

What it boils down to is that video game programmers aren't racist. They're geeks. And they didn't go to any Video Game Academy to learn how to program video games. Most of them began to figure it out on their own and learned how to program in college before picking up how to make games later.

There aren't many schools or colleges or universities where you can major in "video game programming". You can probably count them on one hand with a majority of them being on the west coast. Most of them are terribly expensive because they have to have cutting edge computers and equipment for the students to learn with.

And given how expensive they are, this isn't a race issue, it's a money issue and a fanatic issue.

Are you fanatical enough to spend thousands and thousands of dollars to learn how to program video games? Are you willing to spend that money when going to regular college would probably be cheaper? And if so, after going through years of training to be able to program are you going to be creative enough to make a game that I'll want to play?

A person also can't just create a game. It has to be financed almost like a movie and Rockstar Games and id Software aren't just hiring anyone off the street with a "Gaming" degree. None of them have a gaming degree, they just figured out how to do it back before it was able to be done.

Going into video game programming is the geek's equivalent to heading to L.A. to become an actor.

And if gaming was "racist" I think we would have heard a little something about it when GTA: San Andreas hit the streets well over a year ago and not how it might be the greatest game ever made.