Wednesday, May 16, 2007

American Idol: The Terrible Three

We are getting down to it when it comes to American Idol and thank the Lord because I am getting tired of this show. I personally think this is the worst season with the most mediocre and boring talent of any season. It will be remembered more for Antonella being naked and Sanjaya being weird than anyone who makes a record. So, on to the show.

This week the contestants will sing three songs…whoa, I blacked out a second there. Anyway the judges pick songs then the producers pick songs and then the contestants pick there own songs. I hope I’m ready for this.

So we start off with my TV showing a map of thunderstorms moving through the tri-state area and I catch Jordin singing who knows what about half way through. She sounds great and looks beautiful. I think she is ready to win. She has what everyone is looking for and this song was a great way to start her march to the win.

Blake is next singing Roxanne by the Police. OH NO!!! I don’t know why I said this because Blake loves the reggae type beat. I think he sees dead people because he kept looking to his right. What is over there? He actually did a good job, I hate his voice because it just sounds so bland, but this week it seemed to work. I don’t think he can win, but he could knock Melinda out. He was not fantastic, Paula.

Melinda is next and she is singing I Believe in Me by Whitney “KissMyAss!” Houston. As always Melinda does a great job and I have to agree with Simon, hers was the best of the first three performances. Melinda is super talented, but her look and her attitude hurt her in this competition.

Jordin is back and is singing She Works Hard for the Money by Donna Summer. I thought it was hard to hear Jordin during the verses over the band. Can we get her turned up in the mix a bit? It’s not American Band Idol. I wasn’t really feeling this, dog, until she got to the end and she finished very strong. Still a good job, but her first was her best. Paula has found a new word. Everyone is fantastic.

Blake is up and he is singing the fantastic This Love by that fantastic band Moron 5…ah, Maroon 5. Someone please kill me because I thought he did a pretty good job. I even thought the beatboxing/scratching worked here. The only thing I can’t get over is the fact his voice sounds the same every song. Blake sounds emotionless with every song he sings. You get the same bland voice every time. With that being said, I still think he did well, for him at least. Fantastic!

Melinda is back and is singing Nutbush City Limits. Can they say this title on network TV? This is a good rocking tune. Say what you will about Ike Turner, but he can write a great song. Melinda is the opposite of Blake; Melinda lets emotion come through her voice. She is great at that. You just don’t know if it is true emotion or what she thinks you want to see and hear. Whatever the case, I thought this was great and I also think she was the best of the second three songs.

I’m not sure I can take this anymore, but Jordin is back singing I Who Have Nothing. At first I thought this could be the blow away performance we were waiting for, but I never got goose bumps, so it was just very very good. The best of the night. Paula, this WAS fantastic. I knew Simon would nitpick the oldness of the song, but he’s a d-bag and has to say something.

Blake is back up and can he make it 3 for 3? Surely not. Was that Sir Mix-a-Lot? That is the most publicity Mix-a-Lot has had in 10 years. Good for you, JACK!!! Blake is singing When I Get You Alone by Robin Thicke. Blake sounds out of breath during this song. At least his voice sounds a little different from his regular mediocre timbre. I think he might be able to make something of a career as long as he never has to sing real songs. If he only sings fast hip-hop type songs, who knows, he might actually sell a record. He still sucks, but this was good. Fantastic!!!!

Melinda is back singing I’m a Woman. Haven’t I heard this before? Did she flub lines during the opening verse? Either that or she has been hanging with LaKisha because I understood nothing of the first verse. It was aw-ight, but I think it was the worst of her three and possibly of the night. This shouldn’t cost her a final two spot, but it might. And Simon is right. Every week Melinda delivered and she deserves her chance for the win.

It’s go time as Tony Kornheiser says. I think Jordin is a stone cold lead pipe lock. If she doesn’t move on then every one who voted needs electro-shock therapy. I think Melinda deserves to stay and Blake deserves to go. Blake is not in either of those girls’ league, but he is a guy. And there are a lot of teeny bopper girls who vote and a lot of them will vote just because they think Blake is cute. That sucks because cuteness isn’t a talent, but that is how the world works.

With that being said, here is how it will play out. Jordin is young, talented, and beautiful. She should have no problem getting to the final two and winning. She has been my pick for a while now and there is no need to change. Jordin also takes away some of the votes from Melinda. Melinda is sort of old fashioned and she doesn’t exactly look like YOUR American Idol. I also don’t think Melinda makes a very good connection with younger voters. Blake does make a connection with younger voters and girls’ pant over him. He is the only guy left and he seems young and he will get a ton of votes. For this reason I believe Melinda goes tonight and sucky old Blake stays to get beat by Jordin in the finals. FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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